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Play Fair

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MOTHER SUPERIOR'S INSTRUCTIONS & TIPS FOR SELF CARE

Several months ago, Mother Superior noticed a lot of sniffing, coughing, grimacing, twitching, scratching and farting around the convent. Several Sisters were complaining about itchy pussies, burning buttholes, sore balls, swollen glands, drippy discharges, sore throats, lumps, bumps and tingling between their legs (and not the good kind).

 

When Mother Superior found a crab walking up her leg, she decided to get to the bottom of all these ills. It seems these Sisters were suffering from numerous Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs) and thought perhaps folks outside the convent could benefit from some saintly suggestions. We give these diseases to ourselves and others, and we can do something to stop them in their tracks. Self care and care for others is the purpose of this pamphlet. If we make an effort towards self care, we will all be better off when getting off. Let’s always Play Fair! Cum clean – if you even think that you may have an STD, consider getting checked out before putting others at risk. Be sure you do what you can to protect yourself and others. After all, we’re very special people!

RISK MANAGEMENT

Life is dangerous. And love can be even more hazardous. However, if you’ve made the decision to be sexual, you’ve made a decision to allow a bit of risk in your life (if life is the soup, risk is the spice). That’s where the notion of “risk management” comes into play. No, we’re not suggesting you insure your family jewels with Lloyds of London. But we do encourage you to think about what kinds of risk you are comfortable with and learn about steps you can take to lower your risk for HIV and STDs. Safer sex is not a one size fits all deal. Nor is it an all or nothing proposition. Anything we do that moves our sexual practices in the direction of taking care of ourselves and our partners is a positive stride that should be commended!
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We all know it’s not polite to speak when you have something in your mouth, so you may want to plan in advance what you would say when you find yourself in an intimate situation and need to address certain issues pro-actively. It helps to know your own limits and those of your partner (reading below will help you find them), and to be able to tell folks what makes you comfortable, and what does not.

TESTING & TALKING

Here in the convent, we believe the more we know about our individual health, the better able we are to take care of ourselves and our partners. We encourage sexually active folks to get tested regularly, not just for HIV but for STDs as well. Every three to six months is a good benchmark for the horny ‘mo-on-the-go. But testing is only part of the equation. It’s also important to talk about testing, HIV/STD status, what level of risk you’re comfortable with, and risk reduction measures you use to keep yourself safe and sane both “in the moment” and after. And remember, this disclosure thing is a two-way street. Just as it’s important to Play Fair by telling folks if you think have some kind of critter crisis in your nether regions, it’s also important to Play Fair when you hear that someone may have inadvertently exposed you to some kind of STD. Making difficult disclosures like that demonstrates that your partner cares enough about your health to step out of their comfort zone to make sure you can get the screening you need. Be gracious, thank them for their honesty, and remember someday the shoe (or high heel) may be on the other foot. Pay it forward, and Play Fair.
CONDOMS & BARRIERS

Wrap it up! Condoms and other barriers are the best way to prevent the spread of some diseases, especially the nasty ones. A good rule of thumb is no fucking without a condom. Plastic wrap is a cheap and inexpensive alternative to dental dams and other costly barriers. Just be careful about the kind of wrap: the microwavable kind is only good for cooking your meat, not protecting it from STDs. Also, remember that condoms come in lots of varieties these days (latex, polyurethane, ribbed, studded, flavored, and more). There is even the new and improved insertive condom suitable for anyone with a hole to fill. Try out a wide variety to find the one that works best for you.

PrEP and HIV PEP

My, how far we’ve cum since 1982, 1997, and even 2012! Not only have HIV and AIDS treatments improved by leaps and bounds, but now we merry makers have options for both pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP) and post-exposure prophylaxis (PEP). 

PrEP comes in both pill and injectable forms and, when used correctly, is highly effective at keeping HIV from taking hold in your body. PrEP reduces the risk of getting HIV from sex by about 99% when taken as prescribed. Among those who inject drugs, PrEP reduces the risk by at least 74% when taken as prescribed. (Thanks, HIV.gov!)

HIV PEP, on the other hand, is a short course of HIV medicines taken very soon after a possible exposure to HIV to prevent the virus from taking hold in your body. It must be started at least 72 hours (3 days) after a possible HIV exposure, so every hour counts! 

Now, PEP is only meant to be used in emergencies, so getting on PrEP to prevent HIV infections, and using condoms to prevent other STI infections, is still recommended. PrEP can be prescribed by your doctor or healthcare provider, and is covered by many insurance plans. However, if you’re running into problems with your insurance coverage, or are uninsured, please visit our Sisters AIDS Drug Assistance Program page, and send us an application to let us know how we can help you stay safe, and play fair.

HPV Vaccine

Did you know that 85% of people will get an HPV infection in their lifetime? Most HPV infections go away on their own, but infections that don’t go away can cause certain types of cancer. These include cancers of the penis, anus, vulva, vagina, cervix, and back of the throat. Additionally, if you are HIV positive, your risk of HPV-related anal cancer goes up. (The ANCHOR Study estimates that 1 in 10 HIV positive men who have sex with men will get anal cancer over their lifetime.) Talk about a party pooper!

According to the CDC, HPV is estimated to cause nearly 36,500 cases of cancer in people every year in the United States. HPV vaccination can prevent 33,700 of these cancers by preventing the infections that cause them in the first place. 

HPV vaccination is most commonly done during childhood, between the ages of 9 and 12, but adults up to age 26 are eligible to complete the vaccine series, so it may not be too late for you and your parts! HPV vaccines can be administered at doctor’s offices, some pharmacies, community health clinics, school-based health centers, and health departments.

STI PEP or doxy-PEP

There is another form of PEP that is effective at preventing STIs. A research study found that, when taken within 72 hours of having condomless sex, the oral antibiotic doxycycline reduced STIs by two-thirds when tested among men who have sex with men, and transgender women, including people with HIV. However, the research also showed a slight increase in antibacterial resistance. Additionally, doxy-PEP does not prevent HIV. Your healthcare provider can help advise you about whether doxy-PEP is right for you to prevent STIs.
RIMMING

“Lick it before you stick it” is the mantra of many. However, eating ass can be a risky sexual behavior. Sure, it’s fun, festive and feels oh-so-fabulous, but the parasites you may ingest can be problematic. Here’s the bottom line: even the cleanest looking, most desirable ass can have tiny poo particles full of germs. If you rim, thorough washing does help, but a non-porous barrier makes for a more effective risk reduction strategy.

POPPERS

They slow down time… and increase your heart rate. When combined with blood pressure meds or boner booster pills, you might as well have EMTs standing by before your date starts. If you are gonna use poppers, avoid smoking around an open bottle, clean up spills with cold water, and sip cold water or milk if swallowed. Best to avoid the liquid and put a cotton ball soaked but not dripping in the bottle instead.

OBSERVATION
Check out the person you are with before you lay hands on each other. One Sister even carries a flashlight for those all-too-frequent encounter's in the darkness.
Observing your partner and your surroundings helps ensure a safe sexual experience. You can assess if your partner is respecting boundaries, using protection, and engaging in consensual activities. Being alert to any potential risks or discomfort allows you to take appropriate action to protect yourself and your partner.
BAREBACKING

Throughout the years, “barebacking” has become a very charged term, loaded with guilt. We believe that guilt and shame are never helpful. When having unprotected sex, assume everyone is possibly positive (bearing in mind that barebacking can expose you to other things besides HIV, too). If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck… it might really be the Easter Bunny. Assuming that your play partner is coming from the same space as you is one of the few risks Mother Superior discourages. Better to assume your partner has no idea what’s inside their body. We suggest that folks assume everyone is possibly positive and Play Fair from there.

LUBRICANTS

Water- or silicone-based lubes are the bomb. Oil-based lubes (including baby oil and Crisco) are only good for jacking and jilling off, cooking, and the occasional wrestling match. Oils will break down the surface of latex condoms, reducing their effectiveness. Remember that there is no such thing as too much lube. Be wary of chemicals, fragrances, MSG, hot sauce and the like. These can irritate sensitive tissues around your ass, pussy, cock or mouth. For pussies in particular, be cautious of glycerin in lubes, as it can lead to yeast infections. Experiment with lubes to find one that works for you. Mother Superior’s motto: Wrapped or bare, remember lube to reduce wear and tear.

NUTRITION
& VITAMINS

Unlike Sister Ana Rexorea, whose Last Supper consisted of half a Tic Tac and a diet Coke in 1977, Mother Superior (like every good mother) recommends good balanced meals. Since it’s not always easy to eat right, try to avoid fast foods and take your Flintstones! A daily vitamin and good eating habits help your body recover from all the fun you have.

ALCOHOL & DRUGS

We are not ones to discourage a smart cocktail (or two or three) once in awhile. Just be aware that when you are intoxicated or high, you sometimes forget to take care of yourself. It is wise to not mix sex with too much alcohol or drugs: you could wake up with more than just a bad date.

THE OLD
DOUCHE

To douche or not to douche, that is the question. Douching can cause a lot of problems, and it isn’t recommended. If you do douche, it’s best to use water, not harsh chemicals.

THE AFTER
SEX PEE

Be a whiz kid! Pee as soon as you can after having sex – the sooner the better.

BLOW JOBS
When giving beejays, spit or swallow. Don’t gargle. And don’t forget the courtesy gag.
SOAP &
WATER

Wash your fruit before you eat it. Cleaning up afterwards or between partners is a good idea too.

 

Remember, cleanliness is next to… well, you know.

History, Sis-tory and Credit Where Credit Is Due

Play Fair is a product of the Mother House, the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence in San Francisco. View the original here. Play Fair 2012 is a compilation of work both old and new. The original Play Fair was drafted in 1982 and produced by Sister Florence Nightmare, RN and Sister Roz Erection, along with pioneering community members such as Doctors Bill Owen and Tom Waddell. Play Fair was groundbreaking as the original call to action on the emerging, as yet un-named AIDS epidemic, and the first queer-positive, safer-sex pamphlet. It was (and remains) an alternative life-affirming manifesto for alternative people providing alternative information to help folks decide how to play safe, play sane and Play Fair!

 

The reboot of Play Fair in 1997 reformatted the pamphlet and updated its content, calling what we used to know as “gay cancer” by the name we eventually all came to know all too well: HIV. The 1997 updated provided more details on specific STDs – including expanding the section on the worst STDs, guilt, and stigma, from which all other STDs get their power. Thanks to the amazing artwork of Jim Jeske (aka Sister Reyna Terror) and the Play Fair committee at the time (Sister Dana Van Iquity, Sister MaryMae Himm and Sister Saki Tumi), along with Dr. Virginia Cafaro, Michiko Bailey, and Stephan Thorne, Play Fair 2.0 became a resource to a whole new generation.

 

In this 30th anniversary edition of Play Fair, we have attempted enhance inclusivity and notions of harm reduction in the revised text. We also sought to take on topics long considered taboo within the community conversation around sexual health such as barebacking and the broader notion of “risk management.”

 

The Play Fair 2012 Committee included, Sister Eden Asp (Chairnun), Sister Dana Van Iquity (Editor), Sister Reyna Terror (Artwork), Sister Eve Volution (Graphic Design), Sister Constance Lee Craving, Sister T’aint A Virgin, Guard TheO Pressed, Sister Pat N Leather, Sister Honey BE!, Sister Violet Sin Bloom and Novice Sister Dharma Gettin. Now, stop reading this and go out and Play Fair!

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